Sunday, January 11, 2004


December 21st was the last day that I actually attended church. The church that I had been attending had to close due to lack of people and therefore no money to pay rent. The pastor had been running the church for almost a year. He knows he was called by God and in some ways he doesn't understand. But he does realize that when a real person from God comes to speak only truth, no one wants to listen. We have had many people come and come back but after a few times, they seem to disappear. At first I questioned, wondering why?. But I have come to realize that most people don't want to change. They hope that the way they are is enough. Hearing truth requires change. Who speaks openly in church about all topics. Who is not afraid to lose seats, who cares more about what God thinks than your fellow peers?

Sometimes I don't want to hear the truth either. But you know, once I hear it and think on it, I do change. Sometimes it is immediate and sometimes it takes a long time. I love my pastor and I pray for him all the time.

I have been told that he is opening a church in a new location. Some place cheaper but one half hour further west then the last church. At first I wondered if I should attend seeing as it will be located in Cambridge but then I remember that he devoted a lot of time and effort into the church that closed, went into debt and is still praising the Lord. I must follow him. He is the only pastor in a long time that I have seen really and honestly devoting his life to the Lord. He isn't afraid of speaking truths. I would say that he speaks like he has the authority. He is blessed and I do see it. He does struggle too but who would he be if God didn't let him suffer. Good example of that is Paul.

Well, I really hope the church will be ready and open for next Sunday. Being away from church for this many weeks has really done me a disservice. I never thought I'd actually say I miss church. But I do. And I miss being corrected and told the way in which to go - toward the light. I feel it in my being and I know I need it badly.

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