I went to a concert on Friday (see post below) and I had a great time. But now I sit here in my room wondering if Jesus would have approved of it. Did I serve any real purpose in going besides having fun and going a little crazy for a night? For awhile now I have been struggling with forms of entertainment which I briefly discussed in a previous blog. My pastor had said something at a service regarding worldly things, including movies and music. Did I really just push myself a little more into the world by going to a concert? I know it didn't hurt anyone by me going. And I know Jesus would want us to have fun. But are these the sorts of things we should be wasting our time on?
I found out last week that my favourite tv shows are starting this week - The West Wing, CSI, and ER. You don't know how excited I got. And for what, really? Its not like if I never watched them again that I would feel like I'm missing something. My friend Nadine used to be a tv addict. She use to have so many shows a week to watch that all her spare time was watching the shows she taped. I know I am not like that, and thank goodness she isn't that way either anymore. But where do we draw the line on entertainment. Is there a line?
I absolutely love movies. I have an extensive collection. I go to the movies almost every other week. Why do I feel the need to waste my time watching 'worldly' movies? I am not a music freak. I rarely listen to the radio and when I do its usually to listen to a sermon. But I do enjoy music. Mostly christian and new country.
Is it unrealistic to give up all worldly things? Especially the things we enjoy most. How do we do it? It totally surrounds us. I wish I could move into the country and have a peaceful, quiet country home in which to raise my children away from the distractions of the world. But I know that is unrealistic too. We would always find something to distract us no matter where we are. We need to live for Jesus and we need to start right now. He could be coming any day now, we don't know. So why do we always put off until tomorrow to do the things we should be doing today. We all love excuses. We use them more than we would like to admit.
Truthfully, all I want is to live for Christ and if that means no more of the things I find pleasure in doing well than I don't want them. I know it is so hard and will be hard at first. I used to always pray for a husband, one whom I could love like Jesus loves, one whom could love me as Jesus loves, one whom we could live each day for Christ together, one whom would love my children as their own and teach them as a Godly father would. I don't think that is selfish of me to ask God for this. I believe that He would want this for me as well. But as of tonight I will change my prayer. I will pray to be more like Jesus, to follow in His footsteps, to learn to love as He loves, to have an intimate relationship with the Lord, to have fellowship with Him, to seek more of the Spirit, to strike the desire in my heart to long after Him, to be on fire, to do His will for my life. Jesus is all we need. If we seek Him and desire only Him then He will give us the desires of our hearts. I haven't been doing that, I admit it. But as of today a new desire for Jesus has begun. This is my vow.