Saturday, April 17, 2004


I was flipping through the newspaper this morning and I got to the section titled 'Money'. There are not one but a few articles on divorce. One article stated that 31% of marriages in Ontario end in divorce. The same article tells you how to protect yourself financially and states that you should not only use your heart but your head when 'plunging' into marriage. There is also a guideline on what to do when you see the signs of the end.

I just find this to be ridiculous. You want to know why marriages fail: its because God isn't found. People care too much about themselves and not enough about others. The only question that comes to mind is 'Where is the Love?'. The love is with Jesus and if you forget about Him or just choose to not have Him in your life, you will never be happy with anyone or with yourself for that matter. Divorce happens because of sin. Sin in lustfulness, or you marry because of your lustfulness, or you become or always were too selfish, some just give up. Love is about good and bad times. There is no giving up in love. Could you imagine if God said 'I love you but you have disappointed me a little too much lately, you poor unfortunate soul. I give up on you.'

Bottom line is: You need God, without Him you can do nothing!!! But with Him you can do anything!!! Even mend that marriage that most would think is unmendable.

Here are two stories:

First story: A woman was in a physical adulterous relationship with a man in her church. Her husband was not Christian and was verbally not physically abusive to her about her faith. She and the other man discontinued their physical relationship and her 'Christian friends' counseled her to divorce her husband and marry the nice Christian man who loved her because God had called her to peace. The woman asked her pastor and he stated that God hates divorce because it tears people's spirits and covers them with violence (Mal 2:16). And according to the NT the Lord commands a wife not to depart from her husband, and if she does, she is not to marry again (ICor. 7:10-11). The woman mentally listened to the pastor but later he had heard that she had divorced her husband and married the other man. Basically she wanted permission from the pastor to finalize the decision she was already embracing. Her husband had not been unfaithful morally. She wanted a happy life based on selfish interests. The covenant they made with their mate was significant only when it didn't interfere with their own happiness.

Second story: A woman radiates the character of God. She had been married several years and she discovers that her husband was a homosexual. For ten years she lived an unspeakably difficult life. He was arrested for soliciting sex with an undercover policeman and their oldest son got the phone call that his dad was in jail. The woman prayed constantly for her husband. She asked the Lord if she should divorce. She had scriptural grounds for divorce. But she chose to stay and fight. After some time, her husband was gloriously set free and has been free for 15yrs. He is now a very compassionate senior pastor.

The first woman divorced her husband out of a belief that Jesus wanted her to have peace, yet the Word of God clearly showed God's will for her was to stay with him. The other actually had scriptural grounds to divorce, but she chose to lay down her own rights to fight for the life of her husband. Jesus laid down His rights to come to this earth and die for us!! It is up to us to decide if we want to be conformed into the image of Jesus or stay where you are and let God's image in you change.

Stories taken from ' A Heart Ablaze: Igniting a Passion for God' by John Bevere

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